Me first

0624-2003-0925-1130

It’s easy to look back and see where your life veered off track. But shaking a should-have, could-have finger at your former self is a waste of time. You can’t go back. The much harder task is moving forward with all the longing and regret you’ve engendered. What you do with those lessons earns you an integrity rating. Doing the right thing = 5 stars. Simple concept really.

But here’s the rub: what if the right thing isn’t clear? What if you are standing at a place where the roads diverge and there are two equally meaningful directions? One leading to the bed you made, where you might spend a lifetime shooting down the question marks. Where you might feel safe and secure with your decision, or you might live with a grief so deep, you will never feel whole. And one leading to a frightening, exhilarating freedom. Where a chance to escape the lines society’s lilliputians have tossed over you means risking a wake so large that boats around you could capsize. You might as well be you, a friend says, because everyone else is taken. But who are you?

No one sets out to be self absorbed and foolish. And not everyone can ignore the very real consequences of hurting someone. At a certain point, you have to leave behind the romantic image of the girl in the movie, the one who braves the unknown or unthinkable to get her do-over. This is weighty stuff because the battle lost but the war won is a real scenario. And the clucking your elders do about the selfishness of your generation, which isn’t accustomed to settling for anything, might be deserved.

Photo credit: pdxwolfy.org

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